Friday, July 13, 2007

The GOP Dichotomy

Republicans seem to hate gay marriage.

They also seem to love voting for big masculine men with huge throbbing boners. Masculine sex idols like Fred Thompson and Rudy Giuliani that every woman desires. A real man's man! Someone who can bale hay and isn't afraid of a little nuclear fallout! Someone who only needs a rifle, one bullet and a good sightline to protect the house from a burglar in the middle of the night! "Protect us, Daddy! A bad man is scaring us!" Someone who will give you the best rogering of your life before filing your phone number in the garbage can.

Such a display of bravura testosterone was last seen in the Republican debate a month back when a simple question about Guantanamo received answers that built and built to a fevered man crescendo until Mitt Romney bravely declared that he would invade Cuba, make the whole island America's jail and personally start torturing ragheads his own damn self. This answer was met by a standing ovation from men in pleated khakis and women in polyester dresses. Why? Because it was a man's fucking answer! Quit runnin' yer damn yap!

Railing against gay marriage, raving about the President's bulge in a flight suit. A psychoanalysis is lurking somewhere under the surface.

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