But with so many first timers heading to the polls, some people may not be sure if they're a Democrat or Republican. To help those confused souls out, I've created this nifty Are You A Republican? questionnaire. Proceed!
- Are you a bad dancer?
- Do your pants have pleats?
- Does casual dress to you mean loafers with no socks?
- Have you had the same hairstyle for over ten years?
- Do you iron your jeans?
- Are you worried about taxes cutting into your inheritance?
- Do you work for an oil company?
- Do you hate small birds?
- Are you on a board of directors?
- Do you like tacos, but not Mexicans?
- Are you attracted to women in pearls?
If you answered yes to three or more questions, congratulations! You are a Republican! Get out there and vote McCain!