Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Vague, Vacuous Platitudes

In a fun little article in Salon Tuesday, they examined the primary campaign in Wisconsin. We now know that Obama won Wisconsin, even though his hopeful, uplifting rhetoric isn't seen as a positive by all. Such as people like Beau Moore, who is certainly much too smart to be fooled by mere words.

No, you see, Beau is Republican. And Republicans are smart, thoughtful people who know how the world really works. In fact, Beau himself said, "I would like to think that Republicans are more grounded, practical, pragmatic. Democrats, especially those followers of Obama, are fanciful, non-realistic swallowers of vague, vacuous platitudes. They're just trite statements that mean absolutely nothing."

First of all, Beau, allow me to congratulate you for going to college and finishing it. You picked up a lot of big words and they have obviously served you well.

So when McCain gives a speech in Wisconsin and says things like "In case you didn't notice, the House of Representatives decided to close down and leave town when we had not reauthorized this nation's ability to monitor communications of the people who are dedicated to destroying everything we stand for and believe in," Beau probably realizes that the existing FISA laws still stand. And they've been updated constantly over the last 30 years to account for new technology. And only 5 of 16,000 FISA requests in history were ever denied. No, he would not swallow that vague platitude designed to make us think we're going to be killed tomorrow.

He also wouldn't be swayed by McCain's promises to lower taxes. After all, Republicans are pragmatic people who realize the war in Iraq is quite expensive and that our skyrocketing deficit probably could not absorb further tax cuts. We are staying in Iraq, of course, because we are winning the war! That is not a trite statement that means absolutely nothing. You either win or lose a war! Losing is bad, so we're winning! That statement has some meat on its bones!

McCain also doesn't want the federal government to take over healthcare. "I want American families to decide." Decide what, exactly, isn't clear at this point. Decide that our current healthcare system is terrible, perhaps. But rest assured, John McCain is not full of fanciful, vague platitudes. Republican voters simply wouldn't swallow them!

Oh, also, the economy is doing well.

No comments: