Yesterday, we took a family trip to Disneyland. (Sidebar - It's $300 for 3 adults and a 4-year old to get in.) Today, my brother surprised my with a German beer and food tasting luncheon from noon to 3. Now the Pens are on. I tell you this not to bring up how interesting my life is (as it's pedestrian), but to explain why this preview is going to be so brief and unfunny.
(They're all unfunny, but not all are brief. I love my own thoughts!)
THE NEV-R-WINS (5-2) at ST. A'S CRUSADERS (6-1)
I'd like to call this a clash of the titans, but I'm not sure I'm on the same level as the Crusaders, who are AVERAGING 111 points a game. I mean, I have a 60-point cushion on the team behind me, and the Crusaders are another 45 points ahead of that.
Yahoo is creaming over my team this week, but they're down on AP a bit. Do they think New England's defense is good or something?
I am highly concerned about Charles, McFadden and Calvin. But there's no way DMC (Darryl Mac!) has two good games in a row, right?
THE PICK: THE NEV-R-WINS 110 - ST. A'S CRUSADERS 109
THE PEOPLE'S ELBOW (2-5) at DEATHFROMABOVE (3-4)
People, I am tipsy right now and it's 4:32pm PST. You should see the typos I'm cleaning up. The floor for these beers seemed to be 7.7% ABV.
For the Elbow, Collie is out, Hightower is now the backup, Benson sucks again, and Kitna doesn't throw to Roy Williams because he hates his sinful ways. Let's not kid each other about this one.
Speaking of Kitna, DFA is actually starting him. I can't decide if that's some sort of Andy Kaufman-level prank or not.
THE PICK: DEATHFROMABOVE 71 - THE PEOPLE'S ELBOW 64
BROOKLINE'S FINEST (3-4) at ATLAS SHRUGGZ (3-4)
Both Scott Henry and Bill Polian are hoping Jacob Tamme can replace Dallas Clark.
For the Shruggz, everybody except Hasselbeck plays in the earlier game, so the Shruggz' team dinner will be pretty bitter Sunday night.
THE PICK: BROOKLINE'S FINEST 80 - ATLAS SHRUGGZ 60
HAWKS (4-3) at PURPLE SWIRLS (5-2)
Danny Woodhead is listed a (RB, WR) by Yahoo. I know he's the latest white athlete sportswriter boner inducer, but come on. Anyway, as with all frauds, now that I exposed the Swirls last week, everybody else will start piling on. Assuming the Hawks actually manage to start a defense.
THE PICK: HAWKS 97 - PURPLE SWIRLS 91
IRON CITY POUNDERS (4-3) at LOWCOUNTRY ALL STARS (2-5)
The Pounders have a bad QB, a formerly good receiver with no QB, and the wrong running back from two different teams.
On the other hand, the All Stars are counting on Kenny Britt to have two good games in a row.
THE PICK: LOWCOUNTRY ALL STARS 81 - IRON CITY POUNDERS 75
FIREROCK ROCKERS (0-7) at WHIZ-BANG GANG (5-2)
I was all excited to pick the Rockers this week to get on the win board and act like I was doing some smart...and Yahoo picks them in a rout. Fuck it, I'm picking them anyway.
Man, that wild board sausage and red cabbage sauerkraut I ate earlier was fandamntastic.
THE PICK: FIREROCK ROCKERS 105 - WHIZ-BANG GANG 79